God in This

God in this

David Rim

Hello,

Quite the time has passed friends, strangers and foes alike. Today, in my mind caps off a long journey revisited. Past few months have been a long dicipline journey. My health has been stable.

God, abruptly saved me from darkness through those dms. I haven't personally gave them a Thank You. In action I can only continue to shine as bright as I can in gratitude. A refiners fire gently leading me forward. It's strange because the pressure for the security in life has turned up a notch. Yet, I am seeking God in this first.

I tried to be my normal self and offer some food out of kindness. Yet, I came in for my normal order of food. And God chose my friends here (a different set from the ones I wanted to bless). To share that God loves me, to trust and believe with all my heart mind and soul.

Strange right with this world only going darker by the day.

I am at this crossroad with life again. Not at a point of disrespect, but a firm ground standing at ease. Saying, I will uphold the company to look good. But I stand pat saying, "I follow only Jesus" and draw the line at my mental, physical and spiritual health. Nothing comes above this and the invisible tension of a God that loves me is strange itself. All the hate, strategy and other is trying to make a move. Yet, I still stand not wavering holding tension. God's been too gracious for me. I cannot spread the light quick enough.

God's in this right now. I am planning a couple steps ahead like how I taught myself to survive. But waiting on God is the correct move as I layout my plans. I pray that I align myself with the creator of this world. I know I am not following the rules. Not plugged into the church, the community and the world of clicks.

But Jesus clearly is showing me where I am needed. Because no one else is here out in this vast field. Showing me the matching outfits and initial attraction making emotions complicated. I can't trust my nature so I do not make a false move.

What is my future? Plan for the future? I am only hyper focused on staying in the present and keep failing to believe in Jesus for my future. I know for certain my other half is praying I have not re-connected with them. I know my circle I will be going to war with isn't fully formed like Luffy filling up his team.

God's in this chaos similar to Job's situation years ago, but not as dramatic. As my focus shifts once more. I pray. I surrender. In deep sorrow.